I recall the first time I gave up ... the moment in time and how I felt. I was 12. It was winter in my midwestern home. The mornings were dark and cold. I would rise up early each morning to catch the 6:40am train for my school which was 45 minutes from our house. Most mornings I dutifully, and with little thought, got up and got ready for the day. This day was different. The darkness felt darker than usual. I felt alone. Isolated. I remember feeling tired of the struggle. I was tired of feeling disconnected from my mother as I witnessed her fighting through depression. I was tired of feeling like a target for my father's misplaced and inappropriate sexual attention. I was tired of feeling like a prop in someone else's theater production. I was tired of not being seen as human.

That particular day, I got up and went to school as usual. From the outside, everything about me was the same. But inside, I had just laid the first brick in a prison built on a willingness to give up on myself ... a prison created from the raw materials of self-doubt, low belief, and low self-worth.

My life's work has been to break free from the prison of these lies I've told myself: that I can't handle what life gives me; I am incapable of influencing the behaviors of others; and I'm not worth fighting for.

Our prisons are built over time.

They are built brick by brick, fence link by fence link until what we thought would create a feeling of protection, locks us inside instead.

Our prisons are built from:

• thoughts

• habits

• mindsets

• beliefs

• actions

... repeated again and again and again.

These are the thoughts of apathy.

These are the habits of giving up.

These are the mindsets of "I don't have any control."

These are the beliefs of "I'm not important."

These are the actions of "Fu*k it, I'll do whatever I feel like."

In these moments, in these decisions, in these times of turning against ourselves, we have the feeling of power and control. Finally we are the ones who get to decide.

Yet, what we naively underestimate is the power these little decisions have on our future. That first decision to no longer care feels rather good because we no longer feel the pressure. That first act of defiance where we eat whatever we want, and as much as we want, feels like we are finally the one in charge.

In these little moments, our future self ... our future shackles ... are beginning to take hold.

It's easy to think that our prisons are handed to us. And in some respect they are. They are given to us through:

• generational patterns

• generational trauma

• genetics

• life circumstances

• mirror neurons

• energy transference

We are sensitive to our environments and we become what we "eat" ... the ideas, beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors of those around us.

And yet ... if we as humans were simply only made of what we eat, there would never be change. Healing would never happen. We would be an accumulation of traumas and pain with no end in sight.

Instead, when you look around, what actually happens is that life has a way of repairing itself. Love has a way of restoring our hurts to healing. Light has a way of penetrating even the darkest corners of the earth.

And it always begins with a single moment ... a single decision ... a single intention to change.

Breaking free from the prisons of our outdated habits of thoughts, words, and actions, begins with a single decision.

That's it ... a single decision.

Breaking free begins when we realize that we no longer want to be imprisoned.

It begins by us deciding enough is enough.

It begins by making the choice to break free from all that is holding us back.

And in that moment, the journey of a thousand miles begins.

It took me eight years before the prison of giving up on myself brought me to my knees. By that time I was in college. I gave up on my health by smoking a pack of cigarettes a day. I gave up on my education by dropping all my classes. I gave up on my connections by socially isolating myself. I gave up on myself by blaming the world for my problems.

And yet, as my world crashed around me, my answer revealed itself to me. In that moment I knew that the power to change was all. inside. me.

What has unfolded over these past 30 years has been an adventure to the center of me ... a reclaiming of my heart and soul ... a commitment to stand in the source of all my power ... a disassembly of the prison of giving up.

It is my purpose to help you do the same.

To break free from your prison ... to reclaim your heart and soul ... to own the truth that only you possess ... that you too may stand in your rightful power ... to live the life you are meant to live. This is the stuff that a worthwhile life is made of.

It's time to get started.

By making the decision to break free from your prison, you take the first step to regain your power.

Join our Facebook Community RESTORE Yourself to walk with others learning to be free.

In health, freedom, and joy,

Coach Rebecca